Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Halloween Offenders

'Tis the Fall season and that means scarves, cider and changing colors.  
OR, if you're me, it's all about the candy.  I mean, hooray for scarves or whatever but *candy* is at a veritable free fall around this time of year.  I should know, I bought 3 bags at Target yesterday.
Free fall!

Let's talk about the seedy side of the candy world.  The underbelly, the creepy cousin that your mom forces you to be nice to, the secret family shame.  In other words - these guys:

Bit-O-Honey
I'm pretty sure only dads eat these.  I know mine did.

Candy Corn
aka "Satan's Candy"

Raisins
Getting raisins is just offensive if you ask me.  When I was a kid it was like, "yeah, thanks for trying to not rot my teeth but I think that's the whole point to tonight.  So go back to your fridge, put this pack of raisins back and I'll take your slightly used bottle of Hershey's syrup"
Right?

Mary Jane's Peanut Butter Kisses
The worst.  The absolute worst.  Does any one person on the planet like these?  You remember when you got home from trick-or-treating and you dumped out your bag on the floor and you had a bunch of these?  These nasty things are dream killers.



9 comments:

QueenMeadow said...

First, I love me some candy corn, yum!
Second, my mom liked the bit o honey, not my dad. It's not horrible.
Third, those last ones, I can't even be troubled to remember their name, are the worst candy known to man, eww!

Kati said...

I didn't know those last candies had a name, but I agree, total dream killers. And I concur on bit o honey and candy corn. While I like them (sorta) they aren't chocolate. Or Willy Wonka. So, no good.

Rebecca A said...

Not gonna lie...I'm pretty much in love with bit o honey...However I totally agree on the others - whenever I eat candy corn I swear I can feel my teeth rotting. Handing out raisains on Halloween is pretty much cruel and so are those last....things. They taste as nasty as they look - which is saying something!

Eliza said...

I disagree with you on the first one but full heartily agree with you on the last one.

Lindsey said...

don't forget those orange peanut candy.

Kristy said...

Totally agree on all the candy choices you've selected. Sick. Why can't people just all give out full size candy bars that are packed with sugar and very chocolatey?

Dani & Jake said...

What!? Pretty sure I wait all year long just so I can buy bags and bags of candy corn for cheap. looove candy corn. But I agree with the others :)

kate said...

This made me laugh soooo hard...you have no idea how many times my siblings and I have had this conversation!

Joby, Julie, and Cru said...

I feel like I need to put a campaign sign in front of my house with your name on it since I am in complete agreeance with every all the truth you just exposed