Notice the title of the post? It is in reference to ME. When I was a kid I would wake up in the middle of the night and assume that a noise coming from my closet had awoken me. Of course my over active I-read-too-many-books brain would determine that there was a killer in the closet who was just waiting for me to fall asleep again so he could jump out and stab me to death. Yeah. Fitting title, no?
I cleverly had a plan to mitigate any unnecessary stabbing. There would definitely be stabbing and death, however I wanted to make sure that it was all over and done with one fatal blow. I would wake up, rearrange the blankets so that I was covered only to my middle chest and would extend my neck so it was fully exposed. My thought process being that a single slice could take care of it, rather than be covered up which would require more work on his part.
WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME??? It was all so logical when I was a kid and now looking back I think I probably should have mentioned to my mom that I was helping to facilitate my own murder every night.